Super Flubs, Supergirl!

Imagine if you will that you have incredible powers, such as Super-Strength. Lifting a diesel train off its tracks and giving it a pitch is nothing to you.

Along with that you have Super-Speed, to the level that you can almost be in two places at once, or at least fly off to change your clothes and arrive back within feet of the spot you left within the beat of a heart.

Now, what if you had Heat-Vision. What if you could fire beams of intense light from your eyes in focused rays that could melt concrete and steel within seconds?

If this were you then you'd have much in common with any Kryptonian living on the planet. You'd be in league with Superman and Supergirl! Your power would cause most to quake in fear and persuade any from challenging you. Except that would make for boring comics and television. Someone would have to match wits with you to make for powerful drama.

So when it comes to writing superhero fiction there is a need to put the hero in jeopardy long enough for the bad guys to feel that they have the upper hand and for the viewers to question how will their favorite hero get out of this dilemma. What nefarious traps will the bad guys use to twist the heroes and force them to reveal their true identities or side step an evil plan in order to save a trapped innocent.

These things are common devices used in superhero stories but there are times when the writers don't think things through and leave us with a situation that causes us viewers to slam our heads into reinforced steel girders to numb the pain.

And with episode 207: The Darkest Places of Supergirl, I left a hole in my forehead big enough to sink a grape fruit in.

I try not to expect too much from the show as it consistently comes across as "herolight". We get the situations where one of the characters runs off by themselves and walks face first into danger without any backup or notifying anyone of what the hell they were doing. A couple of times you can forgive but repeatedly is just lazy storytelling. It irritates me to watch at times but that's nothing new.

So what was my mega beef? Here it comes so strap on your feedbag and get ready.

During this episode, Mon-El the Daxamite is captured by Cadmus and momma Luthor. At one point he eggs on one of his guards that sticks his hand (holding a gun) in through the six to eight inch gap between the bars to threaten Mon-El. Now, Mon-El who often claims to not be the hero takes the opportunity and grabs the guards arm, steals his badge, and makes a hasty escape. Bravo! Seriously, what idiot sticks his hand in the lion's cage and doesn't expect to get bit? Unfortunately he's captured shortly after and tossed back in his cell.

Jump ahead a little ways in the show after Supergirl has her showdown with the Cyborg-Superman (which made me wince to see him profess his name in such melodramatic flair). Cadmus has Supergirl trapped next to Mon-El behind Nth metal bars from Thanagar. It's unbreakable. Can't be bent or busted by anything, not even Supergirl. And yet, the knuckle-dragging humans managed to form it into bars and craft a cage. Seriously? Can't be broken by a Kryptonian but we Earthers have the means to melt it down and craft a cage? Not really buying that one.

As Supergirl has a face to face with momma Luthor, the brilliant scientist that gave birth to Lex himself and witnessed Mon-El escape steps up to the cage and puts both hands firmly on the bars. WTF?! I don't know about you but if I had Super-Speed and Super-Strength I'd have me a handful of that bitch and start dragging her through those unbreakable bars until one of her cronies ran over and opened the gate. If my moral code prevented me from really harming her I could do some minor damage and not break my own rules. But that's not what happened. Supes stood there and ran off at the mouth.

But wait... it gets better.

Momma Luthor has a plan. She needs SG to be human long enough to get a sample of her blood. She strong arms our hero to use a special helmet that she can fire her Heat Vision into at full strength until she depletes her cells of all solar radiation, thus rendering her human. So, what does out brave hero do? She agrees. And then they let her out. Out of the cage. The one she can't break out of. The one she couldn't fire her laser eyes out of to melt weapons and burn Cadmus to the ground. She steps out, walks over to lady Luthor and takes the helmet. From her hands. Her human hands.

No fight.

No Super-Speed.

No blasting the bad guys in a second and punching holes through their precious project.

Where the hell is Jack Bower when you need him?

I apologize to the writers for being so hypercritical but when it comes to writing superhero fiction, they have a duty to not dumb down the flipping shows. They need to step them up. They need to surpass the level of some of the wildly innovative dramas that have graced television because, if they don't, then all superhero shows have now taken a back slide into the sixties camp of Batman. I loved the show but no one ever took it serious. And now, thanks to lazy writing like that, no one will ever take Supergirl serious... ever.

All the wicked cool CGI effects in the world can't fix a plot hole or a moment in a show that leaves you slamming your head into a wall. Many of these shows have attained a level above the campy days of Adam West dancing with a bunch of hippies. They had to. No one would take them serious if they were written poorly and relied on bold, slap-stick sitcom hijinks. But there are times when I find myself screaming at the TV when the writers decide to take a break from thinking things through and not spend any time asking some of the bigger questions.

They could have used so many different approaches to make that scene work. Anything from flooding the room with the radiation of a red sun that weakens Kryptonians, to having a little chunk of Kryptonite out making SG sweat in her skirt. Anything else than the weak plodding that happened during that scene.

Again, I'm sorry for being hypercritical but if they want Supergirl to stay successful then they need to stop dumbing down the damned show and inject it with some clever writing. And stop making the heroes mindless simpletons.

Please. Step up the writing.

Please make them think outside of the box. Please amp the show up to reach more people and still retain the charm that is geared for an audience typically ignored by action dramas.

Please don't toss in a half-baked 80's bad guy scheme that might have been used on the A-Team a dozen of more times. We're way past that now. TV audiences expect... demand shows that don't treat them like idiots. Before Supergirl gets the ax and never sees season three, pick up the writing and start making the heroes, and villains, think.

Please. I'm begging you. From an old comic book geek to the writers, take the time to think these scenes through and ask yourself, "Would I be that stupid?" It's harsh criticism but if you think I'm asking too much watch the show. Watch the scenes and think how several characters in the matter of minutes shut their brains off and walked through the plot just to advance the story.

Take a moment. And let me know what you think.

Thank you for listening to me vent. It was starting to hurt.


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